Neverending Story
So here's to the neverending saga and drama that this is my life and my relationships...which I am sure you are all tired of hearing by now.
So because I like to brutally (and voluntarily) punish myself, I checked asshole's myspace. Little did I know, I would find a conversation between him and his ex in which he commented "i let her do it. lol i knew it would make her feel better that way" and she responded "she is a stupid biatch :-)." Yep, for all the world to see...a nice little conversation about how stupid I am. Needless to say, for the first time in my life I feel like I stood up for myself and what I deserved, broke it off and felt no bitterness or animosity - and he took the wind right out of my sails. So instead of feeling like I did the right thing and can move on, I now feel as though I WAS the one that was dumped. How did this happen?!
All this leaves me wondering when I will finally stop getting my heart broke and find someone who will love me endlessly. Even from Texas, 1500 miles away Ian has managed to hurt me again and I am wondering how and why it turned from constant declarations of love ...to this.
So he has certainely been deleted and blocked from every aspect of my life (my cell phone, my myspace...everything)...and I was so hoping we could be mature enough that I wouldn't have to do that. Well turns out HE CAN'T.
Bummer.
So because I like to brutally (and voluntarily) punish myself, I checked asshole's myspace. Little did I know, I would find a conversation between him and his ex in which he commented "i let her do it. lol i knew it would make her feel better that way" and she responded "she is a stupid biatch :-)." Yep, for all the world to see...a nice little conversation about how stupid I am. Needless to say, for the first time in my life I feel like I stood up for myself and what I deserved, broke it off and felt no bitterness or animosity - and he took the wind right out of my sails. So instead of feeling like I did the right thing and can move on, I now feel as though I WAS the one that was dumped. How did this happen?!
All this leaves me wondering when I will finally stop getting my heart broke and find someone who will love me endlessly. Even from Texas, 1500 miles away Ian has managed to hurt me again and I am wondering how and why it turned from constant declarations of love ...to this.
So he has certainely been deleted and blocked from every aspect of my life (my cell phone, my myspace...everything)...and I was so hoping we could be mature enough that I wouldn't have to do that. Well turns out HE CAN'T.
Bummer.
posted by Carrie J at 5:27 PM
2to the Izzo:
Oh darling, people who are mean and manipulative like that are so not worth your time. He obviously sucks, and you can't blame yourself for wanting to believe the best of someone you care about--that just shows what a good person you are, and how hard you try to work on relationships. You weren't dumped--he's just trying to deflect. You're awesome and you have a whole group of people who love you--can he say the same thing? I doubt it. People who do feel good about themselves, and they don't use that self-confidence to hurt others.
Thank you Anna, you are right. I'm glad this blog is here because even though you are far, I still feel like you are here with me. :-D
Thanks for reminding me of all that.
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